Call me Joan

Two weeks ago I started a writing class. My first step in realizing my dream of actually completing and sharing one of the stories that have been rolling around in my head. I've had it on my List of Good Intentions for a while and decided that as they year wrapped up it was time to take action.

In a moment of bravery I registered. In another moment of boldness I showed up to class. Then I got really courageous and actually read my story idea out loud to the twelve people in my class. I was terrified and could hear the waver in my own voice as I did it, but I did it. 

I have a bit of social anxiety. Large groups, new people, putting myself out there, well it freaks me the &*%$ out! I get shaky, sweaty and then I begin to come up with any excuse to not participate. I am the master of excuses.Years ago I wouldn't even send a salad with a hair in back to the kitchen for fear of being noticed. I skipped one too many classes in college because I just couldn't deal with being the center of attention for even the two minutes required to read my homework out loud. People who know me might think it's nuts. I have no issue being the center of attention in a crowd of people I love and adore. Add strangers though and I become the perfect little wall flower.

So despite being the worlds biggest scaredy cat and nearly convincing myself that I didn't actually need to take the class, I went. I went and I read and it was exhilarating as well as frightening. In the end people liked my idea and asked positive, thought provoking questions. Phew. I survived. I was rewarded with a feeling of accomplishment. I guess you could even say I was proud of myself. Wimpy little Erin pulled off a brave moment. Call me Joan of Arc!

It certainly helps to be sitting in a class filled with other book lovers who also have a story to share. Let me tell you, if you like to read, and we can all learn to write these books and then somehow get them published, this group will give you some kick ass reading material. Amazing stories being tossed around our little circle of trust (that's what I call it now, I haven't shared that with any of them yet).

Next week we get to work on the structure and scenes of our stories. I'm really excited to start this. It feels like real progress on a long ago, sometimes forgotten dream.