Hello reality!

Back from a week in paradise (Mazatlan, Mexico) and settling back into reality. It's so easy to just hop on a plane, head to a tropical destination and forget that real life even exists...but then you come back with four extra pounds and a mound of laundry that is nearly as tall as you and well, reality is back.

We had a fantastic vacation. Scott's sister's wedding was beautiful, a perfect beach wedding. The kids were great, the pool was wonderful, the food was delectable. It really and truly was perfect.

I took today off so I could get the laundry done, go to the grocery store, pick the dog up from the kennel and just get our life put together again. It's amazing how "off" you get just being gone a week.

In addition to the daily tasks I'm getting caught up on I also decided to reevaluate my diet and exercise plan. I've got to get the last bit of weight off, I've got to win this bet. So back to the gym I go, with a resolve to mix it up, give it my all, and focus on things that will really work. It also means I've got to focus on our food. Time to eat better! Right now this doesn't sound so horrible. I ate cheese and fried food for a week so I'm looking forward to some healthy options.

I also spent the morning reviewing the Oregon Reproductive Medicine website. They are the other large fertility clinic here in Portland. We've always worked with OHSU but the last few times I had dealings with them I felt like I wasn't getting the answers and support that I needed. The process is scary and intimidating so I really want a place with some better communication and more support. I think I'm going to register us for one of the free seminars they give and then go to an prelim appointment. We're close, so close to being ready financially that I want to get things moving. Today I have the resolve to move heaven and earth to make it happen. Tomorrow that might change (because I fear failure and the process) so I'm going to take steps in my moments of bravery. If I don't make it happen, it's not going to happen at all. I might have to make that my new mantra.

I know that sometimes this is all repetitive, that we've been down this road before, that you might feel like you're reading Pete and Repete's blog, not Erin's. I certainly feel that way. I just hope that one of these times things work out a little different, or that we get a little further along in the process. If you can bear with me I promise to try and make it as interesting as possible, even when it's not about IVF. And those days when you can't take another post about my misery over babies, well you can go back and read the post about the speedo!